For the love of God, take me back! Please?!

It was been SOFREAKINGLONG since I last blogged. I meant to take a month-long break and then do BEDA. But obviously that didn't work out... I just constantly make myself seem inconsistent and non-trustworthy. In my defense 4th-quarter calculus is an ugly beast that no senior with a serious case of senioritis should ever have to battle. But I battle I did and victorious I emerged (sort of).

I'm not really sure where I'm going with this blog. I never actually had a plan or strategy so I guess that means don't expect one? Who knows. I cannot promise to remain consistent because I don't want to inadvertently lie to you all. But I will try my best to continue blogging. That may be difficult come fall because I'M STARTING COLLEGE (WOOOOOO! YEAAAAAAH BUDDY!), but I will try.

Too much has happened these past few months to try to catch you all up in one post. I'll hit the highlight quickly: I had various breakdowns involving calculus and an eleven-page research paper. I hibernated from Blogger (obv.) and wasted entirely too much time on Tumblr (link to the right). I grew closer to some friends and distanced myself from others (whine whine cry cry). I went to prom with a big group of friends and a boy who I never really talked to before and still haven't since. I discovered that grinding at school dances is uncomfortable and awkward, and invariably learned how to avoid this dance move (somewhat gracefully). I learned that as I grow older I become slightly more bitter and that time moves way too quickly. I had my last day of high school (EVER) yesterday. I will graduate on Sunday as valedictorian (LOOK AT ME NOW) with four other friends (no we did not cheat, and no our classes are not easy). I realized that what my life lacked was a place to vent, talk about whatever the hell I want without risking friendships, and just be crazy and stupid in general.

To those whose blogs I follow: I will definitely not be catching up on all the posts that I've missed. I'll most likely start reading your posts beginning sometime in April. And to everyone who cares enough to still be reading this: what's hap-hap-happenin'? Remember that this is a place for loving and venting so please do not hold back.

xoKate

Fast Times at Corn Field High

Sometimes I wonder what compels me to even go to my school anymore. I swear, it's like instead of going to school and getting smarter, people in my class are going to school and getting stupider. Actually, that probably has to do with the amount of pot that a lot of them smoke on a regular basis. I'm serious. The school districts in my county have certain reputations. One's known for slutty girls, one for super-athleticism, and mine is known for the large population of potheads.

In my economics class today the teacher left the classroom to go make copies. The guys sitting around me immediately take the opportunity to start talking about the teacher. Whatever, it happens. I'm 100% sure that the teachers talk about us. But one of them goes, "Duuude did you see his eyes? He's totally high right now." To which another replies, "They're so red! He should be in a better mood than he is, though. I bet him and [insert other teacher's name here] light it up all the time." At this point it's all I can manage to not roll my eyes and laugh out loud. I mean seriously. Did you also notice that he's wearing glasses today, which he doesn't normally do. This probably means that he has a problem with his eyes or contacts. And the other teacher? Yeah, his wife's a police officer. I'm not sure how much "toking" he gets up to.

Just because a large number of people in our school smokes pot does not mean that the teachers do as well. I mean, I guess I could be wrong. There are probably teachers that do get high. But I doubt I'm wrong on this one. God, I've just realized that I sound a bit like a prude. I'm sorry! But I'm bookish and slightly introverted, okay? I'm not sheltered, I have "seen" a part of the world outside of academics and parent-approved activities. But I actually want to do something with my life besides "hang out" and just get by. That said, I honestly can't wait until I can get away from the stoner population that I've been forced to grow up with. Some of them are very nice people, to me at least, but pot does nothing to help the brain cells. And you can definitely tell with the majority of these people.

Just two and a half more months. That's it. I can hold out until then. I think.

What's in a name? That which we call a rose.

I was on my way to lunch with my parents today when I started to think about my friends. I thought about how my friend Jordin started spelling her name like JordIn instead of JordAn. And then I thought about how I have a friend named Jordin. And then I started think about the name and saying it over again and again in my head. Jordin. JOrdin. JorDin. JordIn. And then I started freaking out. Oh my God. I have a friend named Jordin. What the hell.

I think it was just one of those things where you say a word over and over again until the word sounds completely foreign. But for like a split second I wasn't entirely sure that my friend's name was Jordin. Because then I started thinking about all my other friends' names. They all seemed normal. Like, oh yeah, her name's definitely Morgan. Am I crazy? Is there something totally wrong with me?

I like to think I'm not a freak or weird. But, I mean, I doubted the name of a friend/second cousin that I've known for my whole life. Maybe the change in spelling is what freaked me out? However, she's been spelling it like that for four or five years now. It's really not surprising anymore.

Does this ever happen to any of you? I don't mean just when  a word starts to sound not like a word. I genuinely panicked about whether that was her name or not. If not, please say yes. I don't want to be crazy.

*title from Romeo and Juliet

Mae Mobly been a bad, bad girl.

I've been a bad, bad blogger. I don't remember the last time I even read one of the blogs I'm following.... Ughughughugh. I have so much catching up to do. And I'm not even doing it today. I'm just blogging about it so I can feel less guilty by acknowledging my laziness. I don't think my English teacher understands that I have a Twitter, Facebook, Youtube, Tumblr, and blog to maintain. I mean, who does she think she is assigning a 12-source research paper? Jeesh. Please forgive me? I promise I'll be better next time.

Sushi!

 Week 1 of being 18

My first week as a legal adult. [My mom says that you're not really an adult until you can provide for yourself. She kind of has a point.] The glorious day of my birth began with fog so thick I could barely see the other side of the high way on my way to school. It ended with gifts from my family, including my wondrous new Nook! I still haven't really used it yet, though, because I have some books that I bought a while back that I need to read. I finished The Once and Future King, over a month after I started it, and I'm not going to review it. Honestly, I don't have enough words to do it any justice. You should definitely read it, though. My WYSE team advanced to sectionals [yeah!]. Unfortunately, I didn't place in my subjects, English and math, but I don't really mind as much as I thought I would. My friends took me out to a sushi and steakhouse. It was delicoussssss! I hadn't eaten there since prom last year, and I had forgotten just how delicious it is. They [sort of] surprised me with cheesecake. And we ended the night by eating Blizzards from Dairy Queen and watching re-runs of Hey Arnold!

The only downside to this week is the illness I'm now fighting with Advil, Luden's Cough Drops, and cold medicine. I don't think I've ever had a birthday without getting sick at some point. But overall, a great start to my 19th year. And thanks to Lex, Anna, and Hazel for wishing me a happy birthday!

You guys....

IT'S MAH BIRFDAY!!!!!!!!!

I am now a legal adult. In the sense that I'm eighteen years old. My mom says that I'm not really an adult until I can support myself. Poop.

But it doesn't matter anyway....

Because...

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I'm also the proud owner of a helicopter now. Birthdays are great.

Where's the laugh track?

Friday night I attended an overnight thingy at the college I'll be attending next fall. Well, it was actually an overnight for next semester's freshmen who are applying for the honors program. The person I was *supposed* to be staying with was rushing a sorority that night and never showed up. I would have been panicked, but I got to hang out with a couple of my brother's friends. When it was time to go back to the dorms for the night the RA found me a room to stay in.

I go in there, meet one of the roommates and another girl staying there, and everything seems good. They're both nice. We're about to watch The Hangover. The roommate mentions that her roommate is a bit crazy and tells how she fell off the top bunk last night. The girl walks in with one of her friends and I know her. I know her. Great. Because I know her and know what she's like. And I don't like her. She chats for a couple minutes, leaves, and comes back with a group of guys who are also there for the overnight.

The start talking about how they skipped one of the "lame" presentations [how could they know if it's lame if they didn't go to it, stupid] to watch the TKEs get initiated. Now, I have nothing against fraternities or sororities. I have friends and family members who I adore greatly that are/have been in one.In fact, I might join one when I go to college. Who knows. But there's always that fraternity and that sorority which is like how they are portrayed in the movies. So they start talking about how "effing awesome" it was. And every time one of them says TKE [pronounced teek] they start chanting, "TEEK TEEK TEEK TEEK TEEK" over and over and over again. At this point I'm thinking, "Is this really my life? Am I in a sit com?" And complain how they can't go to the party.

This whole time the girl that I don't like is flirting with them, tossing her hair around, standing with her butt sticking out -- the usual.One of the boys mentions that they want to be on the football team. She says, "Well I'm on the dance squad so I'll be sitting right behind you, cheering!" *cue hair tossing and waving of the pom poms conveniently placed on the window sill*

This went on for about ten minutes before the RA, who happens to be one of my friends, saved me. In the end, I stayed in a room with two different girls. I felt bad for the other girl, she seemed really nice, but damn. Her roommate is something else. I mean, I felt like I was in Sydney White or something. I didn't want to be a prude or anything, I have been to parties and been around people like that. But I was not going to be subjected to the ridiculousness of the whole situation for the next nine hours.

January Favorites

BAND/ARTIST: Frank Sinatra I've always been a huge Frank Sinatra fan. My dad listens to a lot of "old-timey" singers like Frank Sinatra, Bing Crosby, and Jim Croce [Jim Croce has nothing to do with Frank and Bing. Oh well]. So I guess you could say I grew up listening to them and learning to appreciate them. I stole a greatest hits CD from my brother. I've tried to listen to all the songs fairly, but I have to admit that "Fly Me to the Moon" and "The Way You Look Tonight" are definitely my favorites. I am absolutely in love with Frank Sinatra's voice. I could go on and on about it, but I feel like I wouldn't do his voice any justice. If you haven't already, you NEED to listen to him sing. He has the voice of angel.

SONG: "We Found Love" by Rihanna I freaking love this song. I know it's repetitive and mostly just a dance mix. But I think that's the reason why I love it so much. It's just so catchy! Anytime I hear I immediately start dancing. Even when I'm driving. Don't worry, I'm off driving court supervision and my ticket's gone. And I also really like the lyrics. And just watched the music video for the first time. It's pretty... whack. I mean, that's the only word I have for it. She's half naked for the whole thing! You know what, I think that makes me like it even more. Whatever. Go Rihanna.

BOOK: The Once and Future King by T.H. White This book is taking me FOREVER to read. That's the reason it's my favorite this month, it's literally the only book I've read in the past month and a half. In fact, I'm still reading it. But it would probably be my favorite of the month, anyway. It's really intellectual. I don't know if any of you have read this, or even heard of it. It's my dad's all-time favorite book, and he really wanted me to read it. I wouldn't have heard of it if it weren't for him. The Once and Future King is about King Arthur, Guenever, Lancelot, and the Knights of the Round Table. It begins with King Arthur's childhood and just goes on from there. Like I said before, it is not a fast read by any means. But if Camelot or King Arthur or Lancelot interests you in any way, I highly suggest this book. T.H. White writes in a very intellectual, yet creative way; it'll definitely make you think.

BLOGGER: Ferweh Fernweh is an collaborated, online magazine managed by six girls, who all have their own separate blogs I believe. Actually, Carlotta who I featured in my November Favorites post is one of the writers. It covers a lot of different creative areas. There's cooking, photography, stories, DIYs, poetry, and a lot more that I'm probably leaving out. I actually made some chocolate pumpkin bars from a recipe I found on their blog, and the bars were delicious. "Blending the past with the present, Fernweh is a collective guide to life made lovely." [from Ferweh]

TV SHOW: The Big Bang Theory I know I'm super late to the party, but The Big Bang Theory is a hilariously, genius TV show. I just want to cuddle all of them. Especially Sheldon. If you haven't already seen it, it's about two roommates/friends that live together, Leonard and Sheldon. They're really smart [especially Sheldon] researchers at a university in California. They have two other friends, Howard and Raj, who also work at the university. Leonard and Sheldon live in an apartment across the hall from Penny, an aspiring actress working at the Cheesecake Factory. Please watch it. It's smart funny, not stupid funny [not that stupid funny is always bad..].

VIDEO GAME: L.A. Noire L.A. Noire is set in approximately 1920's Los Angeles. You play as a detective working different types of cases. You start out as a beat cop and work your way up the law enforcement ladder. You have to search crime scenes, examine evidence, question suspects, follow leads, and investigate lots of different apartments. And the medical examiner always wants to search the body for semen. The is rated R. Just a warning. It's also really long. Literally. There's three different discs for it. I'm currently on the second disc. If you really like murder mysteries and the 1920's this game is for you. It's also not a first-person game, which is always a plus in my book. No matter how many times I play Portal I always get vertigo.

THING: Slippers Yes, more footwear! I bought a pair of $10, ugly slippers at the grocery store three weeks ago. They're not really cute at all, but they're warm. And to me, that's all that's important. I mean, it's not like I'm wearing them out in public.

And guess what! I'll be eighteen in three days, on February 7. That's so weird. I'll be an adult. I've also got a new feature to introduce that will hopefully force me to blog more regularly. In case you haven't noticed, I'm exactly on any sort of schedule or deadline system.

True Love's Apple Stem

Whenever I eat an apple I always make sure it still has the stem. I heard somewhere, when I was like 5 or 6, that as you twist off the stem, say a letter of the alphabet with each twist. For example, the first twist is A, the second is B, and so on. Then, whatever letter the stem comes off at is the first letter of your true love's name.

It's probably just some old wives' tale. I mean, what are the chances of getting the same letter every time? It never fails, though, I do this every time I eat an apple. Call it superstition, habit, hope. I just like the thought of it. Something so grasping, true love, being found in an apple.

Who knows? Maybe it is true. I've gotten the letter I quite a few times... I should start keeping a tally of each letter.

Day 24

A picture of something you wish you could change.

I know I've talked about this before so I'll keep it short and sweet. But I wish I could change what happened at homecoming with my friend/date and how I handled the whole thing afterward. I handled the situation all wrong. I hurt his feelings and messed with my own head. I knew how I wanted our relationship to be (friends only) and now I have to admit, like a big girl, that I might have led him on a bit. Not on purpose. I would never do such a thing intentionally. But, nonetheless, it happened. And then I just ignored the whole thing like a big poop. I wish I could change it. But I can't. I've finally dealt with it. And I've also apologized. After the whole thing, I can't say we're friends anymore. Which sucks. However, I knew it would end up like this somehow, someway. Because I don't believe that two people can be friends when one of them has feelings for the other. The only thing I can do is move on and not put myself or anyone else through this whole mess again.

[This picture is from the homecoming game. I didn't want to post a picture of him.]

Disappoint.

You guys. You guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuys. My Packers lost. We came into the play-offs with a 16-1 record, so close to the perfect season. And then in the first game we played in the play-offs we lost to the Giants. It was bad. Soooo bad. The receivers just pooped out. The top rusher was the freakin' quarterback! I feel heartbroken. And lost. I want to cry but I can't. I just. I. Ugh. No words. None of them. No more.

Abrupt subject change.

Thanks for the input about e-readers! Now I'm kind of questioning whether I want a Nook or a Kindle. At first I was like 99.99% about a Nook, but now I'm not sure. I'm going to Target tomorrow and possibly Best Buy so I'm definitely going to shop around some. And probably read up on e-readers online. I would say I'm still leaning more towards the Nook.

And now I think I might go have a good, long cry. le sigh. Until next season, I guess...

Double Whammy!

I finally got my snow! It didn't actually snow much at all, just a thin blanket. But that's all right with me, any snow will do. So now I get to wear my snow boots for a legit reason and no one can call me out on it. So there.

And my copy of The Fault in Our Stars by John Green came in the mail today! I haven't read it yet so I can't really tell you about it. But this author, John Green, said that he would sign every pre-order and first printing of the book. I think there were something like 180,000 or possibly 200,000 copies. Super intense. No one can ever say that he doesn't love his readers. His brother Hank drew "Hanklerfish" on some of the copies and his wife the "Yeti" drew Yetis on some other copies. Sadly, I got neither. But I'm happy that I got a signed copy!

Also I'm considering getting a Kindle or a Nook. Any suggestions on which is better? I'm finding out that Kindles break more often, but any input you have to offer is greatly appreciated. Happy Friday the 13th!

December Favorites

To be honest, I'm not even trying to get this done before the month ends. I give myself a week after.

BAND: Fall Out Boy Let me be straight with you. Middle school and freshmen year I was a bit of a scenie weanie before the "scene" thing kind of took off. I was absolutely OBSESSED with Fall Out Boy. I think I've mentioned it before, but I am a proud owner of all the albums that Fall Out Boy ever put out. Including the obscure acoustic album and the album that they didn't even promote. I know all the words to pretty much every song. Except for the non-promoted album and the last album [the last album was complete crap, sorry boys]. This month it's been more of a nostalgia thing. I still think they're pretty good. I mean, Patrick Stump's voice is amazing. I wouldn't necessarily recommend them. But if you want to, it won't be a waste of time.

SONG: "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" Come on people, it's Christmas! But I want to be specific about this one. My favorite recording is by Hilary Duff on her Santa Claus Lane album. From 2002. Classic Hilary Duff. And I don't really give a crap that her voice was auto-tuned the crap out of. It's Hilary Duff. I just love her so much.

BOOK: The Hunger Games If you don't know about The Hunger Games I don't even know what to think. I reread it because my friend Kayla was reading them for the first time and I was a little jealous. It's just so good! I'll give you a little bit of background, although I think pretty much all of you probably know about it already. It's set in what used to be a part of America, after a huge war. There's twelve districts all being controlled by the Capitol. Every year they host the Hunger Games where two tributes, one boy and one girl, from each tribute have to fight, or just survive, to the death until only one remains. I guess this way the Capitol can remind everyone how big of jerks they are and the power that they have. The book follows Katniss Everdeen and her experience with the Hunger Games. It's the first in a trilogy and I'm begging you to read it if you haven't already. There's even a movie coming out in March, I think!

BLOGGER: the lexical gap. Lex is probably my all-time favorite blogger. She's funny, witty, and tells it like it is. She has this whole series going on why she hates Twilight. I mean, that alone is reason enough. Seriously, though, her blog is so fun to read. She's really upfront about the way she feels about a certain topic/person/thing/etc. and actually gives rational thought out reasons [unlike a lot of people who think they make sense but just sound ridiculous]. If you don't follow her blog you're missing out.

YOUTUBER: wehavegirlfriends The funniest thing of my life. Three guys, Kevin, Mitchell, and Kyle, tell short stories from their lives. Most of them are about things that happened while they were in high school. Stories like parties, run-ins with cops, and girl issues. It may sound kind of overrated, but these stories are so freaking hilarious and not what you would expect. I laughed so hard I almost peed myself. It's actually more like a podcast with very crudely-drawn illustrations. As in, stick figures. Do me a favor and just watch one. That's all I ask. You will thank me for this.

TV SHOW: Sons of Anarchy I actually didn't watch any particular TV show series this month. All the shows that I normally follow had finished their seasons. My family did get Netflix this month, however, so I decided to watch Sons of Anarchy from the beginning. It's an FX series about a motorcycle gang club.Yes, a motorcycle gang. They live in southern California and run a car repair shop. While secretly running guns and eventually drugs.Listen I know it sounds weird that I like this show, but I can't stop watching it. Plus the main character is hot. In a different way. Watch it, don't watch it, but I'm obesessed.

VIDEO GAME: Super Mario Bros. Wii I bought this game with some Christmas money and it is awesome! It's kind of like a combination of the old school Mario Bros. and Super Mario Bros., with a completely different twist.It has a 4-player option and has a cool feature that I refer to as "bubbling." If you're about to die you can press A causing you to be caught in a bubble. Your teammate can then release you from the bubble. There's also some sweet new power-ups [propeller hat anyone? perhaps a penguin suit?! just to name a few] and some new moves. You can never go wrong with Mario.

THING: Snow boots! I bought these boots on sale in November in anticipation of snow. It's now January and snow has yet to be seen here. In fact, it was freaking 50 degrees this week! What the heck?! I am a cold weather person and the weather has been killing me. Especially because I got these freaking amazing new boots! Not that the lack of snow has stopped me. I wear them all the time. And I will continue to until springtime. So just try and give me crap, I don't care.

And now I need to go catch up on my blogs. Happy New Year!