Fast Times at Corn Field High

Sometimes I wonder what compels me to even go to my school anymore. I swear, it's like instead of going to school and getting smarter, people in my class are going to school and getting stupider. Actually, that probably has to do with the amount of pot that a lot of them smoke on a regular basis. I'm serious. The school districts in my county have certain reputations. One's known for slutty girls, one for super-athleticism, and mine is known for the large population of potheads.

In my economics class today the teacher left the classroom to go make copies. The guys sitting around me immediately take the opportunity to start talking about the teacher. Whatever, it happens. I'm 100% sure that the teachers talk about us. But one of them goes, "Duuude did you see his eyes? He's totally high right now." To which another replies, "They're so red! He should be in a better mood than he is, though. I bet him and [insert other teacher's name here] light it up all the time." At this point it's all I can manage to not roll my eyes and laugh out loud. I mean seriously. Did you also notice that he's wearing glasses today, which he doesn't normally do. This probably means that he has a problem with his eyes or contacts. And the other teacher? Yeah, his wife's a police officer. I'm not sure how much "toking" he gets up to.

Just because a large number of people in our school smokes pot does not mean that the teachers do as well. I mean, I guess I could be wrong. There are probably teachers that do get high. But I doubt I'm wrong on this one. God, I've just realized that I sound a bit like a prude. I'm sorry! But I'm bookish and slightly introverted, okay? I'm not sheltered, I have "seen" a part of the world outside of academics and parent-approved activities. But I actually want to do something with my life besides "hang out" and just get by. That said, I honestly can't wait until I can get away from the stoner population that I've been forced to grow up with. Some of them are very nice people, to me at least, but pot does nothing to help the brain cells. And you can definitely tell with the majority of these people.

Just two and a half more months. That's it. I can hold out until then. I think.

What's in a name? That which we call a rose.

I was on my way to lunch with my parents today when I started to think about my friends. I thought about how my friend Jordin started spelling her name like JordIn instead of JordAn. And then I thought about how I have a friend named Jordin. And then I started think about the name and saying it over again and again in my head. Jordin. JOrdin. JorDin. JordIn. And then I started freaking out. Oh my God. I have a friend named Jordin. What the hell.

I think it was just one of those things where you say a word over and over again until the word sounds completely foreign. But for like a split second I wasn't entirely sure that my friend's name was Jordin. Because then I started thinking about all my other friends' names. They all seemed normal. Like, oh yeah, her name's definitely Morgan. Am I crazy? Is there something totally wrong with me?

I like to think I'm not a freak or weird. But, I mean, I doubted the name of a friend/second cousin that I've known for my whole life. Maybe the change in spelling is what freaked me out? However, she's been spelling it like that for four or five years now. It's really not surprising anymore.

Does this ever happen to any of you? I don't mean just when  a word starts to sound not like a word. I genuinely panicked about whether that was her name or not. If not, please say yes. I don't want to be crazy.

*title from Romeo and Juliet

Where's the laugh track?

Friday night I attended an overnight thingy at the college I'll be attending next fall. Well, it was actually an overnight for next semester's freshmen who are applying for the honors program. The person I was *supposed* to be staying with was rushing a sorority that night and never showed up. I would have been panicked, but I got to hang out with a couple of my brother's friends. When it was time to go back to the dorms for the night the RA found me a room to stay in.

I go in there, meet one of the roommates and another girl staying there, and everything seems good. They're both nice. We're about to watch The Hangover. The roommate mentions that her roommate is a bit crazy and tells how she fell off the top bunk last night. The girl walks in with one of her friends and I know her. I know her. Great. Because I know her and know what she's like. And I don't like her. She chats for a couple minutes, leaves, and comes back with a group of guys who are also there for the overnight.

The start talking about how they skipped one of the "lame" presentations [how could they know if it's lame if they didn't go to it, stupid] to watch the TKEs get initiated. Now, I have nothing against fraternities or sororities. I have friends and family members who I adore greatly that are/have been in one.In fact, I might join one when I go to college. Who knows. But there's always that fraternity and that sorority which is like how they are portrayed in the movies. So they start talking about how "effing awesome" it was. And every time one of them says TKE [pronounced teek] they start chanting, "TEEK TEEK TEEK TEEK TEEK" over and over and over again. At this point I'm thinking, "Is this really my life? Am I in a sit com?" And complain how they can't go to the party.

This whole time the girl that I don't like is flirting with them, tossing her hair around, standing with her butt sticking out -- the usual.One of the boys mentions that they want to be on the football team. She says, "Well I'm on the dance squad so I'll be sitting right behind you, cheering!" *cue hair tossing and waving of the pom poms conveniently placed on the window sill*

This went on for about ten minutes before the RA, who happens to be one of my friends, saved me. In the end, I stayed in a room with two different girls. I felt bad for the other girl, she seemed really nice, but damn. Her roommate is something else. I mean, I felt like I was in Sydney White or something. I didn't want to be a prude or anything, I have been to parties and been around people like that. But I was not going to be subjected to the ridiculousness of the whole situation for the next nine hours.

Liar, liar pants on fire.

There is one type of person in this world that I absolutely cannot stand: posers/try-hards. You know who I'm talking about. Face it, we all have these people in our lives. The girl who goes around at a party saying to guys, "I love hot wings, working on cars, and country music!" For some reason, she thinks that this will instantly make the guy attracted to her. And maybe, occasionally, it does. But what happens when he finds out that a) you only like your hot wings boneless and in BBQ sauce, b) the one thing you can do to your car is pump gas and change your oil, and c) Taylor Swift is the only country you listen to? By that point, he may not care. Good for you. But to that I say, he is obviously not the type of guy worth keeping if he stays with a girl he met based on a lie simply because he likes dat ass thinks she's pretty. [I realize that this is a country-fied version of a try-hard/poser, but you can probably catch my drift.]

I would just like to know what's wrong with this society. How has it reached the point where girls think it's necessary to go around claiming to be something they're not in order to get a guy? I don't think I'm the crazy one here. I would rather be with a guy who's interested in the things I am. Too much time and energy would be wasted on trying to be someone I'm obviously not. Not only that, but I would imagine that things could get boring fast. If you have to fake common interests with someone, that's pretty sad. I mean, if you're only doing this to get with a guy, not have a relationship, fine, whatever. It's your life. Ruin it how you please. It just seems unfair to whomever you're conning.

And I'm not trying to imply that all guys are dumb enough to fall for this stupid little game. In fact, a lot of them will probably catch on pretty fast. Pretty much two minutes into any conversation based on a "common" interest will fall apart. It will be pretty apparent whether or not she knows what she's talking about. But a lot of these guys will go along with it. I mean, hey, she's good-looking, she kind of knows what you're into, and she's good-looking. Shallow is as shallow does. I guess these people need to find each other. I just find it sad. And boring. I can't imagine getting myself into a conversation about cars. As soon as a guy starts talking cars to me I know this conversation is going nowhere good, and fast.

And that's just one of the many types of try-hards/posers that exist in this world. More specifically, the type that I have to deal with pretty much everyday of my life. If you agree with my rant, then you've most likely been picturing a certain person/type. So feel free to comment letting me know who it is that just rubs you all the wrong ways. All of the ways. If you want to rant, I want to listen!

Don't you

hate it when you're wearing jeans and they get all baggy and loose at your knees and calves? I am eternally searching for the perfect pair of jeans that DON'T DO THIS. Maybe I should just invest in some jeggings.

That's all. Now I'm going to go have a Paranormal Activity movie marathon with some friends before seeing the new one at midnight.

I really just want to be alone at this point.

I think I might have made a mistake. Which would normally be totally fine because I make mistakes all the time. We all do, we're only human. Except it's not okay this time because it involves someone else and their feelings.

You know how some people say that a guy and a girl can't just be friends? That eventually one of them will end up falling for liking the other? I think I've finally come to this realization. You see, I've been pretty good friends with this sophomore boy since last year. We used to be in band together, before I quit, so we got to know each other through all the band stuff. We've hung out with a few times, with other friends present, and text each other. I should have stopped it though. He's told me multiple times that he likes me. Every time I've told him that I don't feel the same way about him. I just want to be friends. After I'd tell him that he would stop texting me, and then start again. I don't know, maybe he thought that some day he would have a chance. I know. I should have stopped it. But we were really good friends.

For a while I honestly did think that we could just be friends. That he'd finally accepted it or stopped liking me that way or something. So when he asked me to go to homecoming with him, I said I would. [Are you cringing yet? I am.] I really didn't think anything of it. Two of his friends were going with mine so I thought we were all going as friends. Now I can see this was not the case at all. The whole night he kept hitting on me. I obviously won't lie to myself, every girl likes to be hit on. But I knew this was going no where. It got to the point where I was just trying to avoid him. I mean, it was my senior homecoming, I really just wanted to dance and have a good time with my friends.

This whole time I've never wanted to be with him. There's no iffy feelings or maybe possibly I do. Trust me on this, when you know, you know. He keeps saying we should hang out sometime. He also keeps tweeting about it. Which kind of peeves me because I hate when other people know about my business without me offering it. I feel horrible about the whole thing. I never wanted to hurt him, I still don't. But I'm thinking that I have to tell him we can't even be friends anymore. It's just not possible. There's no way to do this without hurting him or making his friends hate me. Besides actually being with him, which isn't an option. I'm not going to lie to myself, him, and everyone else. In the end, that would hurt more than cutting it off now would.

I hate this feeling of regret and guiltiness. I hate how one person can make you feel so awful. I hate knowing it's mostly my fault. And I especially hate having to be the bad guy and do the dirty work.

Breakin' the Law

Last Wednesday. Ho-hum. Ever had one of those days where you look back and say, "If I had done this one little thing my day would have been ten times better." Or perhaps, " If I hadn't done this one thing I could have avoided a catastrophe mistake." Well that's how last Wednesday went for me.

It was a dark and stormy night... Okay, not so much. Actually, it was a normal day. So normal, that I really can't recall much of anything that happened that day. Or maybe this one incident just over-shadows everything else. I suppose I woke up, went to school, came home from school... And got a speeding ticket. Yep, my first ever.

The neighborhood I live in is surrounded by a golf course. Not good. I hate the golfers. For some reason they think they're all hot and stuff and can do whatever pleases them. For the purposes of this post, please refer to the drawing I have beautifully created.

 The horizontal street you see is the street I, and most of my friends in my neighborhood, take to get to and from school. Originally there was supposed to be an underground tunnel that connected both sides of the golf course underneath the street. However, due to poor planning on the park district's part, there was nay money to fund such a fairytale. Then they proposed closing the street altogether so the pretty little golfers could safely cross the street on their fatmobiles golf carts. Big no-no from the city. Instead, they put up a speed limit of 25 mph along about half of the street. The speed limit on the rest of the street is 40 mph, just as it has been for as long as I can remember. [You only have to go 25 mph when the light on the speed limit sign blinks. Which is pretty much all day.] See the street where the cop park ranger car is? Well it's pretty well known for park rangers to sit there and try to catch people speeding. This was actually the first time I've seen one there.

So I was driving along on my way home from jamming to some music. I'll be the first to admit that I don't actually go 25 mph. Usually I slow down to 30-35 mph over the cross walk and then speed back up. I mean, that's what most people do. As I turn into my neighborhood I look into my rear view mirror and see those stupid red and blue lights. At first I have this insane thought, "Okay, maybe I'm not getting pulled over. Maybe he's just trying to get around me." Duh. Of course not, I was just being stupid. He pulls over behind me and gets out of the car. "Miss, you were going so fast you were burning rubber!" Right, because tires burn rubber going 43 mph. Then he tried to tell me I didn't use my turn signal turning into my neighborhood. Which is a lie, I know I used it. [I've been told by many people I overuse my turn signal. But that's only because I hate it when people don't use it.] Mind you it wasn't even a police officer, it was a park ranger. He asks for my license and registration. And what do you know. I had forgotten my license. I think at that point I was ready to cry.

So after he comes back to my window after searching for my license number he says, "I could get you for four violations right now." Then he stopped talking and just looked at me. I think he wanted me to cry. Which I did, but that's not the point. He didn't need to be a jerk about it. Then he goes, "However, I'm only going to give you a ticket for going 43 in a 25." And, of course, he was all smug about it. I know he was being nice, but you could tell he knew he was being nice. Then I drove the 2 minutes I had left to drive to my house.

Now I have to go next Wednesday to the state attorney's office to get court supervision. Basically, if I don't get a ticket in the next six months the speeding ticket will be taken off my record. I have to pay $120 for the ticket and $100 for the court supervision. I'm so mad. Mostly at myself and a little at the park ranger. Plus any time I tell anyone I got a ticket from a park ranger they laugh. The one time I didn't get stuck behind an elderly person actually driving the speed limit there's a park ranger! Ugh.

Frustrated.

This blog was supposed to be about my recent fair exploits. However. I hate the new Yahoo Mail format. I've been trying for the past couple of days now to get the pictures from my phone onto my computer. I used to just text them to my email and download from there. But. Whenever I save the pictures to my computer they get saved as some kind of coded word thingy.

Normally I would devote my life to figuring this out. But I have an essay to write for English 101. And for some reason I have writers block. I have never experienced this inconvenience before. Needless to say, this is extremely frustrating. I also have a US Government paper to write. Luckily, this was super easy to write. Unluckily, I somehow have 31% plagiarism. What?! How many people out there have written papers on the Tinker v. Des Moines Independent Community School District Supreme Court case?! I find myself incredibly frustrated.

Dios mio, not even three weeks into school and I'm already stressed. Is it summer yet? Can I retire at the age of seventeen? Is this real life? Please say no. And now that I've complained at you lot I'm going to open Word back up and stare at my half finished essay. Yay.

I find that Leo sometimes helps.

A (Not So) Textual Love Affair

Have you ever gotten this text "hey:)"? I have, on many different occasions. Who am I kidding, more like once. I absolutely despise these kinds of texts. They're very vague. It could mean: Hey, I like you but I'm too scared to actually tell you so I'm just going to send you a smile. Or it could mean: Hey, I'm just trying to show you how special you are, opposed to every other girl I text, by not only texting you, but smiling. However, I choose to interpret it to mean: Hey, I'm not very creative and can't start a conversation; therefore, I'm going to fake it and force you to be the creative one. Admittedly, there are probably hundreds of different interpretations. But any way you do it basically comes down to one thing: laziness. I feel like if someone really does like you they should put the work in to show it. Or if they're a player, they should get some new moves, because eventually it's going to get old.

Who does this in real life?!

You may be one of those people who actually like getting this text. And that's nothing against you. Yeah right. Besides the whole laziness factor, I think my dislike of this text stems from my hatred of emoticons. I just don't like them. Especially the winky face, it makes a simple text suddenly seem so dirty. The only thing I want making me feel dirty is Leonardo DiCaprio. However, if you decide to go with typing out the emoticon [happyface, winkyface, sadface, etc.] I find that entirely acceptable. Mostly because I like irony, partly because you can get creative. [Poopface, crapface, shitface, fu---- You get the point.]

Most of the time I won't bother to grace the texter with a response. I can already tell that the conversation's going to be a riveting one:

• Him: hey:)
• Me: Hey!
• Him: Sup?
• Me: Oh not much, just planning my revenge on the Sith for taking away the beauty that was Anakin Skywalker. You?
• Him: oh cool nm playing cod
• Me: Really, because I heard that video games kill your brain cells.
• Him: lol sweet i wish some1 wuld make me a sammie ;)
• Me: angryface
• Him: lol it wuz a joke lol so wuts new

And then I don't respond because I hate it when someone a) makes that dumb "ooooh you're a girl, you should be in the kitchen making sandwiches and getting me some Natty's!" joke, b) has something else they want to talk about but expects you to just know and start talking about, and c) uses abbreviations when it would be much more simpler just to SPELL THE DAMN WORD OUT. Oh, and I have an extreme hatred for "lol." [But who doesn't nowadays?] I kid you not, I've had pretty much this exact conversation before. With multiple guys. Texting has taken the standard pick up line [Hey girl, are you from Tennessee 'cause you're the only ten I see!] to a whole new level. In fact, I think I prefer a lame pick up line to a "hey:)" text.

Aaaand now that you know my texting pet peeves... I guess this is why I really don't like to text all that much. I know it's a lot to ask for someone to be creative and original while texting, but seriously? It just seems a little ridiculous to be texting different people when you're having the same conversation with every single one. Got any pet peeves about texting? It only seems fair to ask you to rant since I just went on a big ole ranting rampage.


Peace out cub scout!

I think I'm going to lose my mind.

Really, life? Really?! Why do you continually kick my ass? It's like as soon as you punch me in the gut, I turn around and you're slapping me in the face. I don't get it. I would try and hit back, but I'm afraid you're much more experienced and skilled than I am.

You guys. I gave in. I gave into the one person I always said I wouldn't. I know you're tired of hearing about him, but he won't get out of my life. We sorta kinda make up? I'm not even sure. But somehow we're going to prom together next weekend. And going to see Water for Elephants on Monday [I will not let him ruin this movie for me]. He never apologized. Maybe he thinks he doesn't need to, but he really does. However, I can't go to prom alone because all my friends have dates. And the guy I want to go with is going with someone else [story of my life]. So I'll play nice and be friends. It's not worth all the drama and fuss. I just really hope he doesn't think we're dating. Because I'll just have to nip that in the bud. I'm not going through the past 5 months again. I refuse.

The good news? I went to TJ Maxx with my friends Kayla and Morgan yesterday and got a super cute Steve Madden jacket for $30. Woo!

Summer's in 19 day. Only 19 days until freedom. In 19 days I can conceivably kick him out of my life for good. [Who am I kidding?]

To tan or not to tan, that is the question

I know I promised to do Day 09 today, but I'm pushing it back another day. Why? Because there's something I would like to discuss [rant about].

For the first time since October I wore shorts. [Viva! Hace calor!] And I couldn't help but notice how white my legs are. Just an little observation. And honestly it doesn't bug me, it never really has. I'm a naturally very light skinned person. In fact, I think it runs in my family. I mean, sure, I'm kind of really fair skinned and white. But it's a really tone, especially when I blush. Which is often.

Now a lot of people do not like being white. Just look at shows like Jersey Shore, where the darker or tanner you are, the better.  A lot of the girls from my school go tanning on a regular basis. During the winter when they can't tan outside, they get a tanning membership at a tanning salon. I honestly don't get it. Why's is so much better to be tan? I don't know about you, but I'd prefer not to be wrinkly when I get older, or have skin cancer. I've never purposely set out to tan. If I've gotten tan it's probably because I've been outside a lot. [I burn more than I tan. But whatever, not the point.]

I wanna know when it got to be that tan is better than white? Think back to the 19th century and all the years before that. Back then it was the whiter the better. [I'm not trying to be racist here, I'm just talking about natural skin color.] In fact women went out of their way to stay light skinned. Of course, then it was better because it meant you didn't have to work outside. Which was the only reason you would ever be tan. Unless you were from a country where dark skin was the norm. So when did that all change? What's wrong with light skin?

I guess the reason this bugs me is because I've had so many people compliment me on how pretty my skin tone is. And then the conversation gets going and they finally ask whether I'm going to start tanning or not. All right, you just said how pretty my skin is... and now you think I should go tanning? Maybe I'm perfectly happy with my skin color. Ever think about that? Maybe I don't want to be all gross and wrinkly when I'm older. My grandmothers both have [had] beautiful skin. I'd prefer to keep it that way for the rest of my life. Just because you think tanner is better doesn't mean I do. And it's not surprising that other people do too.



[I enjoyed hearing your random facts, it's so interesting to hear about other people's randomness.]

Home Sweet Wal-Mart

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to live in Wal-Mart? I mean, its got everything you could ever want. [For the most part.] Some of their clothing is actually pretty nice. You could camp out in the camping section at night with a sleeping bag and tent. They've got a plethora of food. All the entertainment you could ever want. All the personal hygiene stuff. It'd be perfect! I think I might substitute Wal-Mart with Target, though. When my town finally got one I thought it was just the best thing ever. 

If you've ever seen the movie Where the Heart Is starring Natalie Portman, then you can probably see where I got my inspiration from. I saw that movie once and for some reason it made me really want to try to live in Wal-Mart. Never mind all the uncleanliness of it all. What I can't imagine, though, is having no place to live. No place to call home. I was pretty young when I first saw the movie and it devastated me that she had nowhere to live. It just blows my mind that some people don't have a place to call home. No place where they can just curl up and hide from the world on a bad day. Whenever I see people living on the streets I'm always reminded of how thankful I should feel to be blessed with a home.

Another thing I'm thankful for is contacts. I really cannot stand to wear my glasses. Which I had to do today. I use to never have allergies, at all. I considered myself pretty lucky since both my mom and brother have terrible allergies. I thought that I was going to be like my dad and have none at all. But I've noticed that around this time of year my left eye gets bloodshot and starts to burn. I can barely keep my eyes open. So I was forced to take them out and wear my glasses. Of course, I could be completely wrong. I never do take out my contacts, ever, even when I sleep. Maybe it's both.

And as for a third random topic, I'm going to speak briefly about boy troubles. [Why do I suddenly have so many?] Well, you see. There's this freshmen boy, we'll say Dawson, who I became pretty good friends with, mostly because of band. Don't think I go around making friends with freshmen boys. But next thing I know he's got one of our mutual friends asking if I like him. As in like like. Sigh. Why can't I ever just have a guy friend who's not interested in dating?! I was trying not to be mean about the whole thing, because I still wanted to be his friend. But I think I made matters worse.

I told her I didn't like him like that, but she's a little scatterbrained and never told him that. So I'm thinking that he knows I don't like him, and we can still be friends. But then last week I find she never told him and he texts me saying, "Do you see this becoming more than a friendship?" !##%^#% I knew it was too good to be true. So I said I didn't think so. And now things have gotten awkward. My life, I swear to God. Why do the ones I want to just be friends with want to date me?! And why do the ones I actually want to date act like they have no clue?! The bright side: I've gotten good at letting guys down easy. As easy as it can be when you're telling them you don't want to date.

May the force be with you! [God bless Star Wars marathons.]

I know what you really are, creep.

I don't like to talk about religion on here (it's kind of private thing for me) but I think it's relevant to tell you that I've given up Mt Dew for Lent. I'm sort of addicted to Mt Dew, it's the only pop I drink. Besides Crush, but I don't really count that because it doesn't have caffeine. For the past three-ish weeks now I've gotten home from school and suffered from caffeine headaches. On top of the migraines I usually get about 6th hour. How much longer until Easter? The plus side is that I've been drinking a ton more water. But the other down side? I've began having dreams about Mt Dew. Yes, dreams. So I wake up craving Mt Dew everyday. That certainly helps the cause a whole lot. (Thank you subconscious!)

Now the real reason behind this post. A boy. Not just a boy, but the boy I mentioned in a post a while back. I'm well aware this all happened like 3 months ago. But I'm the type of person who gets mad really fast, quickly becomes indifferent, and then a long while later gets to thinking about it and becomes angry again. This boy and I aren't friends anymore. Like at all. Which that in the first place kind of hurts me. I mean we were friends like a year ago before all this stuff went down. Now he hardly ever talks to me. In fact, most of the time he acts like I'm not there. Like I don't exist. It's actually insulting, I was one of your close friends and then all of sudden I'm nothing? He could at least give me some excuse. I probably would have settled for an extremely lame one.

But now there's this rumor going around school. See, one of his best friends is this girl, we'll call her Ernestine. They do everything together, even with her boyfriend. I found out from my sister's friend that this boy may or may not have gotten Ernestine pregnant. Gotten her pregnant back in December. Hmmm, you may ask, wasn't that when this boy and you were talking? Yes, yes it was. So not only did he possibly have sex with her while we were talking, he might also have gotten her pregnant. And I know that I could be freaking out over nothing. It's all possibly and might and may or may not. But there shouldn't be rumors like that in the first place. From my experience there's always something true, however small, in a rumor. (Plus she hasn't shown up for soccer, which started like a month ago, even though she's a huge soccer freak. And her stomach is questionably round. And according to one of my friends hard. I don't know, that's just what I've heard.)

Also, sometimes he'll come up to me and randomly start a conversation. Like the past 3 months just didn't happen. And then he'll go back to, "Kate who?" Make up your freaking mind. I'll play nice, but I know what you are. A shady, good for nothing, piece of shit who plays the whole nice, quiet guy thing for his advantage. I know what you're all about buddy. Oh, and now I see him walking around school talking to these two freshmen girls. Why would a senior suddenly want to be friends with two freshmen girls he has never talked to before two months before graduation? While your best friend might be pregnant with your baby? Creep.

Whew. Just had to get that out of my system. My friends have heard this a thousand and one times so I thought I would share it with you guys. =]

(BEDA in 3 days! Yes, I've decided to do it.)

One of Those Days

Today has been a somewhat trying day for me. It's mostly just been one thing after another. We didn't have school yesterday so today was the first day back. And what do our P.E. teachers decide to do on the first day of the week? Circuits. Yuck. It's basically eight different stations around the gym where you do 50 reps of something like push-ups, burpees, line jumps, etc. with a lap in between. And then a 5 minute run. We did these 3 times. I mean, come on! It's basically a Monday morning! Then in English we have a huge, ginormous, humongous research paper due tomorrow that we've been working on since the beginning of January. And we had a trig test where I missed at least 3 problems (I didn't even do one of them), each worth 7 points. And to top it off my printer ran out of ink when I was trying to print my paper. Whew!

And let me just say that people (cough, cough Jeannine) have not been helpful. In after trig, in band, two of my friends and I were talking about this hard proof on the test when Miss I Know Everything walks up. "Oh, are you talking about the first proof? I thought that one was so easy!" Yeah, I bet you did. Know what else would be easy? Me, kicking your ass. Anyways... But seriously, is she trying to get people to not like her? Because it's working. I honestly just don't get it.

Exactly! (My dad and I joke about this all the time.)

This has inspired me to write my top five least favorite personality traits: 

1. Pompous: There is nothing more I hate most in this world, when talking about people's personalities. It's just so ugly. I don't mind a little bragging. I get it, you're proud of something you did. I do it myself sometimes. But when it's excessive, and I've done the exact same thing. No. This is not all right.
2. Pessimism: I understand what it's like to be depressed. I myself battle this frequently. But not everything in the world is death and rain storms. It does nothing to help other people's moods when you constantly talk about how you're going to fail at something or something bad is going to happen.
3. Dishonesty: How hard is it to be honest? I feel like it's more of a bad habit. I can't stand the feeling of not being able to trust someone. I operate under the belief that if I catch you being dishonest with me once, I'll probably never expect you to be honest. It's just so shady, and makes me wonder what else is a lie.
4. Lazy: I know a handful of people who are very intelligent and comprehend things easily. But they just don't apply themselves! It just blows my mind how someone can be so smart and be capable of getting As and Bs but decides to barely pass or fail. I know part of it is my perfectionism, but why not use the gift God gave you? Why not give yourself a better future?
5. Dependent: I'm aware that it's okay to be dependent. To a degree. I mean, I'm dependent on my parents to support me and stuff like that. But I don't think it's okay to be dependent on someone emotionally. It's not healthy to base your happiness on another person's. It's just so unattractive to see someone who can't live without their boyfriend or girlfriend. Again, I know part of my feeling like this is just the way I am. I'm an extremely independent person. But, please, try to be your own person.

 Sorry for the kind of complain-y posts lately, but that's just the kind of mood I've been in lately. The months of January to mid-March do that to me. Hoping your day's been better than mine!